Sunday, March 20, 2011

Using Guilt As A Tool To Manipulate

Using guilt as a tool to manipulate your partner or loved one may yield your desired results at the onset but it can be destructive to intimacy in the long run. When a person uses guilt, she is setting a condition before she gives her love to the other. When someone takes you on a guilt trip, try these strategies to get your relationship back on track.

1. Repeat to them what they just told you. "Are you saying that just because I don't take you out everyday means I don't love you anymore?" Or, "I have the feeling that you're mad because.....Am I right?

2. Set your boundaries. Ask them what they want and suggest options but let them know what you're not willing to do. Don't let them dictate their plans to you. Try to strike a balance between what they want and what you want.

3. It may hurt them but don't be afraid to say no. Give an explanation but if they persist, remain steadfast on your decision.

4. If you're in the wrong, acknowledge you fault and ask for forgiveness.

The process from guilt-laden relationship to one that's healthy may be a long process but It's well worth it.


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