Reasons Why Men Dump Women

They sure have enough excuses - "I need more space", "I think we'd be better off as friends" - but what are the real reasons men leave their ladies? We get behind the old line, "It's not you, it's me," to find out.

The thrill is gone. He won;t admit it's the whole reason, but it may be well be. When he starts feeling like he's seen your whole bag of female trick, or you're not the mysterious, glamorous creature you were when you started dating, he starts getting the itch to get out. Some men get far too caught up in the fantasy thing. Once that mystery and enchantment is gone-oh, say, about the time you ask him to pick up your laundry-he will be, too.

You've change. Shallow? uh-huh, but it's true: if you've stopped taking care of your appearance once you've got him hooked, he'll use that as a reason to bail out. (Incidentally, he's more likely to stick it out if he's let himself go, too).

You tried to change him. It's practically a cliche by now, how women fall for the "bad boy" with the mistaken assumption that they can remake him into the man of their dreams. It's dangerous enough even to try. But if you actually succeed, you can start counting the minutes until he cuts the cord. In an effort to get back to being the free spirit he once was, he'll change his surroundings-starting with you.

He can't breathe. Sure, he loves attention, but if your adoration starts to smother him, he'll bolt. Ditto when your relationship is marked by too mane spats, too many jealousy-or your constant need for his reassurance of how special you are, how solid your relationship is, and how much you can trust him.

You're not his ideal. He went into your relationship with an unrealistic idea of who you were and what kind of couple the two of you would be. Now that he's realized you're not The One, he's going to look for someone who is.

The Three A's to a Great Relationship

Are you having problems with your partner? Does your relationship need some cranking up? Address it as soon as possible. Most splits are due to gradual slips in each partner's behavior rather than a single cataclysmic event. This is a sad thing since it can be prevented. Here are some simple tips for in order for you to have a great relationship with your partner.

1. Appreciation. Gratitude is the simplest life preserver for relationships. It makes the other person feel seen and heard, that he or she matters. Strive daily to think of something that your partner did and thank him or her for it, even those on bad days. It will help you both weather the storms of love.

2. Attention. This advice goes out to men but women can learn from this too. Don't be too busy that you forget to give your partner attention. Husband, have you stopped bringing her flowers or giving her a note for no reason? Wife, have you become too busy with housework that you've forgotten to say I love you? Remember, you're committed to a human being, not to a work machine or a house robot.

3. Appearance. This tip is for women although men are not exempted. Men are visual creatures so take good care of how you look. Make your appearance a priority. And men, if you expect your wives to look good, please do the same as well.

A healthy relationship will bring back the emotions and desires that drive you to each other. So keep at it!

10 Ways on How To Let go of Past Loves

Its not that easy letting go of someone you love. Plenty of people are having a hard time letting go of past loves and are still attached to the memory of a past romance. Come unstuck with these techniques and discover yourself - happy and free. If you are stuck in an emotional tie that no longer serves you, it's time to set yourself free. Here are 10 fool proof ways to enjoy the present and release your past.

1. Get real about what was. According to pop psychologists, we are most magnetically attracted to people who embody the characteristics of our parents or early caretakers because we unwittingly seek in a partner someone who will re-open our childhood wounds. Our adult selves can finally heal those wounds, but the more negative those characteristics are(from critical and controlling to charmingly irresponsible) the more intense the attraction we feel.

We can get relief from out nostalgia for a past love by remembering that the intensity of the memory does not necessarily mean the relationship was best for us. Remember, what fueled the attraction may not have been love, but your soul's desire to heal the past.

2. Forget the merge-urge. Subliminally, people in love promise they will meet all of each others needs while having none of their own. This is why we long for the feeling of fullness again, of merged egos. But then it was an illusion and temporary and, in reality, it was not love. Had the relationship continued, you would have seen boundaries snap back in place, for no one would have made you feel that high forever.

3. Are you romanticizing? The persistence of a romanticized memory contains an addictive element but the element is not in the former relationship - it's in you. So toss out your rose colored glasses. Chances are you are romanticizing weaknesses as strengths. Was he self employed because of his independence or his inability to accept authority? A realistic assessment is empowering. Keep a cheat sheet of unflattering truths and refer to it when you slip into dewy daydreams. It is easier to let go of a human then a hero.

4. There's no such thing as "one and only". Repeat this 20 times. Ask yourself whether deep down you believe that remembering the relationship preserves it in some way. Write a new belief code, such as: "I have never left a relationship that would have made me happier than i am now." Don't mythologize as "one and only" someone who actually might have been unremarkable.

5. This is me -- free! Visualize yourself saying to a friend, "oh my gosh, I haven't thought about x-mas in years!" Absorb how fantastic you'll feel, how happy and energized, and say thank you for that. Remember that visualization is not about vision. It's about what you feel when you envision. Feel your freedom and cement it with gratitude.

6. Bury the memories. Your brain believes your body, sort of a reverse of the placebo effect. You begin to feel free of the past when you act free of the past! don't talk about the old relationship, don't note anniversaries, or send mental messages.

7. Turn to creativity. One of the best balms for emotional wounds is creativity, which is different from staying busy. Doing something creative, whether it is writing, drawing, composing lyrics, changing your hairstyle, planting garden, thinking of a great gift, or redecorating a room, connects you to yourself and a power greater than yourself.

And creativity is deeply engaging. It fills you from the inside out.

8. Be grateful. Swap longing reverie for gratitude. Be thankful for your blessings, for the good things in your life. This will help you from dismiss what you no longer have.

9. Exercise to exorcise the "ex". Go to the gym regularly, or go for a fun run. Regular exercise keeps your endorphin levels high and keeps you from falling into melancholy memories.

10. Shut the door on the uninvited guest. Do thoughts of a past love pop up at unexpected times? Respond to such thoughts as you would to a neighbor or acquaintance who drops by without calling first. Do a mental yawn and look for the nearest "exit".

Is the Guy You're Seeing Mr. Wrong?

Here's a nice article for ladies out their are having second thoughts about the guy they are dating. Do you have a feeling that the guy you're dating might be more of a dud then a stud? Take a look at some telltale signs.

• He is selfish. If the word compromise is alien to your man's consciousness, chances are he's only thinking of himself. Healthy men know how to make compromises, relationship experts say.

• He doesn't appreciate you. The guy you're dating should not only appreciate you but also respect you, your friends and family.

• He has no drive. Does your guy spend more time on gimiks with his buddies or watching TV than anything else? If he's busy doing things that don't take his life to new places, he might be a dud.

• He doesn't show emotion. To be in a healthy relationship, both parties need to be open and honest about their vulnerabilities - and not be afraid to show their emotions. If you find that you're giving more emotionally to the relationship than he is, it might be time to move on.

• He doesn't have a good relationship with his mother. If a guy's relationship with his mother is constantly strained, it's not a good sign for your relationship. He does not have to be a mama's boy but a guy - at any age - must have a loving and healthy relationship with his mother.

• He has no friends. Not having many friends, or having friends that are rude, is a sign that he's not easy to get along with. And men who are not easy to get along with must not impose themselves on women who seek a loving relationship.

• He makes you feel bad about yourself. Why would you want to be around someone who doesn't make you feel happy, successful and fulfilled? If he doesn't listen to you and constant;y puts you down, it's a sign of trouble.

• He's untrustworthy. if you are unable to trust your partner, you will spend countless time and energy wondering about his capacity to be honest and straightforward about your relationship.

Should You Keep From Your Love One?

I saw a clippings at the library about relationships, and read an interesting topic, its a complicated one if you ask me, its about keeping secret from your partner. Its true when a man and woman marry, the two become one. So does that mean you cant keep secrets from your spouse anymore? Experts will say that even in marriage, people need boundaries and a certain amount of privacy. A wife doesn't automatically have the right to go through her husband's wallet or a husband to read his wife's emails unless permission has been granted. "The key is moderation," says therapist Terrence Real, the author of How Can I Get Through to You?(Scibner, 2002). "If a boundary is too firm, a couple can become detached and disengaged. If you set no boundaries at all, a couple becomes too enmeshed, which is unhealthy."

Be aware that privacy in marriage all comes down to an issue of trust. Since your relationship with your spouse is unique from any other couple's, only both of you can tell when it's a betrayal of trust to keep something secret or, inversely, to intrude another's privacy.

As a guideline, ask yourself the following questions when deciding when it's OK to keep a secret:

• Is this a harmless issue that i can keep to myself?
• Can I honestly justify why I'm withholding it from my partner?
• If my mate finds out about this, will it be a source of conflict?
• If my partner could see what I'm doing, would he or she be hurt or alarmed?

After you answer the questions and you're still in doubt( I know i was at first hahaha), chose openness. It's always better to come out clean than to withhold something to your partner. As one expert points out, the more that spouses need to keep private from each other, the more prone to instability the marriage will be.

Ways To Mend A Broken Friendship

Have you gotten in a fight with your best friend? and after the fight you realize, hey you miss your friend. then you think, maybe what you argue or fought about, wasn't worth throwing your friendship away. Either way, something went wrong and you want to fix it. Here are simple steps on how to mend a broken friendship.

1. Practice empathy. Broken friendship often occur because of misunderstandings. your friend's behavior was likely because of the problems in his/her life and not a wish to hurt or use you.

2. Write your friend a letter about what you're feeling. Let your anger go but explain to your friend why you feel wronged, Writing helps you get your thought in order.

3. Mark a date on your calendar. Choose the right time or occasion for approaching your friend. Don't do it when you know your friend is engrossed in an important activity, like when your friend is rushing a report for the office.

4. Stay calm no matter what happens. Remember that anger clouds your vision and inhibits communication. When patching up a broken friendship, staying calm and cool will allow both of you to see issues objectively.

5. Apologize. Forget your pride and reach out to your friend even if you've been wronged, Your friend may not even realize he/she treated you badly. Or even if your friend does, she/he may have been scarred to make the first move.

6. Relive good memories together. Nothing mends a broken friendship better than shared history and strong positive vibes. Remind each other why you've stayed friends for so long.

7. Accept change. Not every broken friendship can go back to the way it was. You've both grown during your time apart. But it's worth maintaining good friendship even if they're not as close as before.

The Dragon in the Year of the Tiger 2010

This year continues to shower the Dragon people due to lucky stars and guardian angels. Therefore, this is a good fortune for you in all areas of activities. But of course, they are also some upleasant months you have to attain. More over, some harmful people and envious friends willpush you down. Be productive and industrious in career undertakings in order to attain higher goal. All the best opportunities are there for you to achieve, provided you don't lose your chances. There is nothing to stop you from being happy in your business endeavors. Investment or expansions are good to carry out. A right year to produce new initiative or ideas for future moves. But always remember, there are also some unpleasant months for you to face. Financial matters will be active, try to manage them properly. No major illness strikes your health this year as indicated. But the health matters of your family members should be your top concern. For the protection of yourself and all your loved ones, extra care and home security needed. Domestic relationship satisfaction is easy to attain, a happier trend on your home life. Dragon people will enjoy the fullest in their love and romance. Love life will take most of your leisure times. Therefore, there will be more romantic periods in your affair. Proposal is favorable, but wedding is better scheduled next year.

The Rat in the Year of the Tiger 2010

Ive already posted about the Rabbit in the year of the Tiger so im just gonna post all the animals left, since i still have my moms booklet. I better finish this all before she starts wondering where the booklet is. So im gonna post the remaining 11 animal birth sign.

The year of the Tiger for Rat people may not be considered as auspicious as last year. This is a year mixed with favorable and unfavorable fortunes. Female rat is much better than male rat in many aspects. The fortune of your ambitions in career and in love relationship is good. On the other hand, your health and your financial condition are not so meaningful. There are accomplishments in many areas of your career undertakings. Help and support from some influential friends and good Samaritans are for you to benefit. In the career point of view, best opportunities are there for you. For young rats, you are advised to exert more efforts so that dreams can easily be fulfill. However, financial fortune is not favorable especially in those unfavorable months. Try to manage your monetary activities carefully. You have a tendency to harm your finances. Stay away from sweet offer and avoid risky investments. Gambling and heavy bank borrowings should be avoided. As for your health, you will be vulnerable to sickness. Through proper medication, those sickness can be manageable. Food sanitation and safety, balance diets and regular exercise are the best remedies to maintain your good health. For your own safety, you are advised to take extra care when driving or traveling. There seems to be no problem in family relationship. Activities at home will keep you busy this year. A passionate love life with less misunderstanding awaits you this year. Enjoy the fullness of your love and romance through out the year.

Say "Hello" to Anyone

Want to improve your relationship?? Say "hello" to anyone daily for at least one month. Here are some reasons why you should practice this.

• Saying hello means acknowledging someone's existence, however brief it may be, to acknowledge some else gives that person a sense of worth. In exchange you become a person to them too.

• Theres a study regarding this subject, wherein middle school teachers had to greet their students individually every month. The result, it raised the students productivity by 27 percent.

• It can save your marriage. When did you last say hello to your spouse?.
  

And don't forget to say hello each morning to the person who needs it most - YOU